Return of the good....and the sad

Matt here on a new date and time. Sorry for the extended break but I am back on Monday, which should be a much easier day for me to post. Hope everyone had a great holiday season. On to the comics:

The Good

Zits

I usually like Zits, but I really enjoy this one and the misguided optimism and teenagers (and, actually, all people). It is an especially nice touch to show the alarm clock in the first panel at 5.46 so we know exactly how long he thinks it might take to melt all that snow. Well done.

The Brilliant Mind of Edison Lee

Maybe this was Jeremy from Zits when he was younger? What a great way to explain away one's shortcomings (and quite American, as well).

The Sad

Six Chix

I know it is early in the morning, but this one is still confounding me. This would be funnier if the line was "That's the only walk she'll ever get." What exactly does the original mean? Does the dog walk someone off the plank and then swim back to the boat to get rescued? Owww.....need more coffee.

Pros and Cons

First, though it may appeal to some, this style of art in a comic strip is not very appealing. Why does the guy on the right not even have a mouth? Second, the joke (if that is what is supposed to be) isn't that funny at all. He didn't say "we want what you want", he said "two can play that game". Sigh.

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Beach Fun

Hello readers, time for some Wednesday comics review!

F Minus

Thank you purple-suited beach lady for saving your fellow sunbathers from the ghastly sight of your husband's man-parts. Though the beach does look pretty empty, I suppose you could have let the old man have some fun in his declining years.

The Lockhorns

Leroy is not one to talk. His balanced diet probably consists of a gallon of stout and a gallon of lager.

The Piranha Club

This comic illustrates the perils of colorizing an originally black and white strip. I think the woman's lips were supposed to be a deep red, but colorist can't color over black ink. Either that, or she's really a goateed man with a rather unfortunate glandular condition.

Zits

Jeremy's friend, Hector, is still sporting that awful makeover. I know it is probably an attempt by the cartoonists to make him look less like Jeremy's dad in a wig, but now he just resembles a fat Gene Simmons (not a good look).

The Duplex

Why has Fang made friends with a pumpkin? I know he's a dog, but isn't he usually portrayed as the brains of his side of the duplex? This seems out of character.

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The Good.....no Sad (at least today)

Greetings. Matt here and what a bizarre day to review the Sunday funnies. As we pause to honor those who suffered and lost loved ones on September 11, it seems silly to even critique a comic. That said, it is interesting that over 100 creators chose to honor September 11 today and, even more interesting, that some did not.

It doesn't bother me, I just it find it curious, for example, that Stephen Pastis didn't find a way to reference it at all in Pearls Before Swine. But is it really his duty to do so just because the other creators did? Jim Davis did nothing in Garfield today to show any remembrance. Neither did Tom Wilson in Ziggy. Or Jef Mallett in Frazz.

As mentioned, personally, it doesn't bother me one bit as it is all about our ability to make personal choices. I can't pretend to be the creators of those comics or pretend to know how they made their decision so it doesn't bother me too much. Heck, LOTS of creators didn't show anything special today. But I have already seen disappointed tweets and Facebook posts to the creators and it's not even 9 AM EDT.

Anyways, as my personal change to all the funnies today, I will only highlight good and show no sad. Did I think all the September 11 tribute funnies were good? No way. But I am not going to point them out today. I'll be back to my snarky ways next week.

Oh, yeah. And Go Browns. I'll be at the game with my daughter this afternoon.

The Good (and no sad today):

Pearls Before Swine

Dang, I love this comic. Not much to say other than I love the second to last panel and rat's conclusion in the last panel. Solid entertainment

Argyle Sweater

Nice image of the fish parent at the door and the two fish watching tv. I love thinking about fish ordering any pizza in the first place.

Zits

IMHO, easily the best of the tribute comics from today. Perfect way to honor but still maintain the tone of the comic. Well played.

See you next week!

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My Charlie Brown Vase!

When DC announced their relaunch a few months ago, people quickly noted that the Justice Society of America were nowhere to be seen and that the JSA are not even a part of the new universe. Well, DC just announced that the JSA will be returning. Here's the story from iFanboy.

The JSA is my favorite superhero team so I welcome their return. Heroes from that era were so original and unique. Green Lantern, Hourman and Mister Terrific were my favorite.

All right, let's get on with today's comics.

Crankshaft

Can't anything ever go right in the Funkyverse? I swear to god there is more pain and hurt--both emotional and physical--in this universe than any other universe in existence. And that includes Universe-471L "The Bully Universe".

by Chuck Asay and Zits

In a roundabout way, possibly. Give poor people more money and they will spend more which helps boost the economy which creates a demand for products leading companies to possibly to begin hiring again....

What the hell, Jeremy! Not yet having the privilage of having a teenager in the house I have to wonder do they really just destroy things? I certainly hope not because I don't have the tools (re: chains) to deal with them.

Hi & Lois

You better do as Thurston says Hi or else you will wind up at the bottom of that water hazard behind you.

The New Adventures of Queen Victoria

Dear Pab Sungenis, In order for a citation to be valid on Wikipedia, the source must be a third-party source so something like a newspaper article about you that says you are from Vineland. You cannot be your own citation. In fact, I noticed that someone added this comic strip to the Vineland article as the citation which doesn't actually verify that you are from Vineland. Also, I am questioning the validity of you actually being included in the "Notable People" section especially since you yourself do not have an article. Sincerely, Brian - Wikipedia Editor since 2006.

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A Day Early, Still A Dollar Short.

Dick Tracy, July 3, 2011

Dick Tracy, July 4, 2011

Dick Tracy's new creative team continues their excellent run by resurrecting a villain from the good ol' days, in a pretty modern plot of DVD bootlegging. This is also the 4th or 5th plot since they took over? The fact that I can't keep track means that the pace has picked up just a wee bit.

 

Zits, July 4, 2011

Stay classy, Zits. Of course, the strip is named "Zits," so bodily functions shouldn't really come as much of a surprise. And I probably shouldn't mention that a running gag at my house is "It's your cooking!"

 

The Argyle Sweater, July 4, 2011

Take my word for it honey, it's not you, it's AT&T.

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Watch Out for Kite-Eating Trees

I know I've been pretty flaky with the Sunday posts but hopefully from this point on there will be a regular stream of Sunday comics.

Ronaldinho Gaucho

Unless eating your vegetables also turns you into a man, this is veering awful close to child pornography.  I guess not drawing the nipples make it okay.

That's Life

Wouldn't this work better with Batman considering the 1960s Batman TV show had all the "POW!" and "ZOW!" and "BORT!" graphics?  Also considering Superman would be impervious to being stabbed by an action bubble makes this comic not work.

Funky Winkerbean

"Yeah, that Class of '11 just isn't as good as the Class of '10.  I hope they all die."

"Well, considering this is 'Funky Winkerbean' that is a plausible storyline."

Blondie

I love how Dithers hit Dagwood so hard with a pillow that it knocked Dag's shoe off.  Now that's a wallop.

Mary Worth

Sweet Jesus.  First Wilbur takes his fake son fishing and then takes his real daughter kite flying?  Does Wilbur not know how to have a good time?

Zits

I love Bazooka Joe comics.  I kind of wish there a book that reprinted the thousands of strips that have been produced.  I also hope somewhere in those strips is the story of why Joe wears that eyepatch.  Some horrible marble accident I assume.

Gasoline Alley

Hmm, considering birds could give a flying fig about our timekeeping methods I don't think they really notice our time change because they still wake up at the crack of dawn.

Now you all need to go over to my site and follow me on Twitter.

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Better Late Than......

You all should check out my nearly worthless site which features Thursday Comics--a random selection of comic related stuff with history and possibly commentary. Let me know what you think, I have obscure comic strip characters, terrible comic books and the history of Felix Comics.

Now, I love just about everything superheroes. Superheroes are awesome. Superheroes are usually put on some of the most coolest things I have ever seen and the Joker is one of the best villains ever created. Creative, memorable and utterly psychotic but neither of those words describe what the hell this is:

Well, maybe psychotic does.

Zits 8/1/10

RANT I hate when I am behind someone at Taco Bell or McDonald's and they don't know what they want. It's Taco Bell. It's McDonald's. Their menu constantly remains the same. McDonald's has burgers, Taco Bell has faux-Mexican food. Movie theaters have basically the same thing: assortment of the same candies, popcorn and an Icee-type treat. QUIT HOLDING UP THE LINE!!!!! RANT OVER

My Cage 8/1/10

I remember reading somewhere that we were going to learn what happened to the humans in the comic strip My Cage and I guess this is it. Based on what I looked up based on the horn and hoof flag, a group of farm animals ran off a Mr. Jones and took over his farm and the pig started a revolution not unlike the Soviet Union.

Curtis 8/1/10

"No, son. You cannot ride your skateboard to pick up our pizza."

How hard would that have been. Have it delivered or go it yourself. Also, only one pizza for four people? That doesn't seem like much.

Crankshaft 8/1/10

Ha! Even God isn't safe from the wrath of Crankshaft.

Born Loser 8/1/10

In Wilberforce's defense, he more than likely did not pee on his hands.

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The Streets Will Flow Red With the Blood of Joey's Victims

Sundays come way too quickly.  I'm looking into doing something different here on Sundays every once in a while because I feel I need to do a change-up.  In the meantime, if you don't already, you should check out the blog Nerd Armada by C.H. Greenblatt.  Greenblatt was a storyboarder on "Spongebob Squarepants", "The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy" where he created and voiced Fred Fredburger and created "Chowder".  You should check out his blog and some of his original illustrations on there.

Funky Winkerbean 5/23/10

Or, instead of going to all that work you could just not log on for awhile.

I have to admit that about eight months ago, I deleted my MySpace account and I never looked back.  No one did anything on MySpace and from what I can tell no one still does anything on MySpace.

Baby Blues 5/23/10

I would like to get my son into some summer things like softball or swimming or karate but he's gone for the summer so it would be kind of a waste of money to sign him up then have him be 200 miles away.  I, however, would never have my kid's schedule so full that there's no time to sit down mainly because I'd be doing all the toting around and I would rather just stay at home some days.

Zits 5/23/10

What is going on with Jeremy's mom's boob in the next to last panel?  She either needs a better bra or needs to start wearing one.  I know having kids kind of puts some strain on them but still...jeez.

Brevity 5/23/10

The mastermind behind Comics I Don't Understand is mentioned in today's Brevity which is kind of cool when you think about it.  On the plus side, luckily his girlfriend-cum-fiancee saw it before those birds ruined it.

And who doesn't love fanny?  Boy the stories I could tell you!

Dennis the Menace 5/23/10

Holy shit.  Joey is asserting himself and his blood-curdling voice is powerful enough to turn the world red.  I take back ever homoerotic thing I ever said or thought about in connection with Joey.  I just hope when he takes over he spares my life.  I'm a really good cook...

The Knight Life 5/23/10

I believe this.  If humans were to disappear, the Earth would do fine and would eventually correct itself.  I say, just be more environmentally friendly, it's not hurting anything and maybe when our grandkids' grandkids' take over the Earth, it won't be like Los Angeles on a 90 degree summer day.

 The Born Loser 5/23/10

I have books from year ago I have yet to get around to reading.  My wife has books I could possibly read and maybe someday I'll get to those.  Since I started my new job, I've read like six book and am currently working on "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy" series.  I wish I could just take a day and sit and read and maybe this summer I can.

Is Brutus just staring at the cover of that book?  He hasn't even opened it yet?

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Retarded Dinosaurs are Bad at Math

Today's batch actually includes some comics that made me laugh because they were, get this, funny.

But, there's also a few that I just have to rag on. There's so many comics out there, it's hard to know which ones you should make fun of and which ones you should just ignore and hope it vanishes into obscurity. It makes me wonder sometimes if sites like this are keeping some comics alive when they really should be taken out back and shot.

However, if you want, there's totally a new comic up over at Carafe (which today, I will just link to instead of integrating it into my review... gotta keep it fresh)!

Baby Blues (03.16.10)

Aside from this mom going waaaaay overboard in the last panel, that kid is totally right. He's simply learning from the greatest wealth of knowledge on the Internet: Wikipedia.

The Brilliant Mind of Edison Lee (03.16.10)

See, this one is funny because there's a cow in the kid's living room, and that old man was trying to convince him that it was a bad idea. That kid, although VERY awkward looking, is awesome.

Pros & Cons (03.16.10)

Okay, so I laughed pretty good at this one. It's funny. Deal with it. That crazy guy is going to murder you someday, so laugh at this now.

The Lockhorns (03.16.10)

I didn't necessarily want to draw undue attention to this stupid comic, but let's be honest, people really must think this is funny. You know, like, older people maybe? I'm not sure. All I know is that there's a ton of commercials about this same thing, but I don't find it all that crazy or funny. Most people would be like, "Didn't you read my Facebook?" "My tweet about dinner?" But, the fact of the matter is that this comic is just about two incredibly lazy people and lord knows it took that woman a decade to type that darned text message anyway when it probably took her two steps to be in the living room. Besides, what is it? Odorless food? Gosh, when dinner is ready at my house, I'm ready to eat, not waiting around for someone to tell me it's ready. I'm nearly shoving my wife out of the way to get to the food. Maybe that's just me...

Todd the Dinosaur (03.16.10)

When I first saw this, all I could hope for was for this dinosaur to be retarded. That's why he got a D on a math test. He can't do math. He's a dinosaur, very similar to a book I just made called, My Friend Terrence the T-Rex. But, then I read all the way to the end, and found that his conclusion was equally as funny. It's always good to throw in a Family Circus jab, but I still think that dinosaur has a mental deficiency.

Zits (03.16.10)

How in the world could that be "in a good way"? Ever. On any planet? Someone help me understand why the dad had to say one more thing. The bit about the coupon book was humorous, but the dad just kind of screwed up the punchline by saying something idiotic. And not in a good way.

The end.

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Crikey!

This is an open comment to the people who still publish and distribute the comic panel Natural Selection:

I understand that this is a repeat from 2003 but you people over at Creator's Syndicate do realize that Steve Irwin was killed by a stingray in 2006, right? You would think that this would be a comic never to be shown again like the Peanuts where Charlie Brown befriends a Klan member*. It's time to remove this strip from rotation because I feel it's in bad taste and I've made fun of everything from pregnant women to cancer survivors.

*Not true.

Zits 2/9/10

Yeah, yeah, cell phones are small enough to hidden by a piece of bread. What disturbs me is that the bread makers have decided to put their logo right on the bread as it's pretty clear the bread is not in a bag.

Mary Worth 2/9/10

So as Dawn happily rubs her cleavage, I wonder why Mary hasn't meddled more during this storyline. Don't tell me Dawn does it all! If so then the next storyline will feature Mary Worth trying to dispose of Dawn's body because only Mary may meddle.

Hi & Lois 2/9/10

What's with Lois' eyes? She is either shocked to learn that her eldest boy has true adult feelings or the sight of Chip on his guitar is getting her all hot and she's wondering what the penalty for incest is in their state.

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