Terrible Tuesday

by Hal Bent

It's Tuesday, which is like a Monday on repeat, so getting right to the comics under review:

Born Loser, The by Chip Sansom

I don't like it when the Born Loser (is his name Brutus? Yes, Brutus Thornapple. What a great name) is not in his own strip.  Today, we have an unpublished writer and part-time freelance script editor working hard to make some green to support his dreams and has to suffer the slings and arrows of this doofus.  Hey Boss-Guy (Veeblefester, How depressing that I know their names), the waiter didn't buy or cook your steak. He is not the owner. He makes an obscenely little amount of money, and he definitely does not need to hear your hackneyed joke that was old and tired when Vaudeville was new.


Bottomliners by Eric and Bill Teitelbaum

"I am also a charter member of the FREAK-daily-mile-high-club. Wanna see how freaky I am, Baby? Don't let the suit throw you off or anything--I'm a FREAK!"


Dick Tracy by Joe Staton and Mike Curtis

Umm, that second panel is awesome.  Is that kid withe the ponytails holding a turkey drumstick? Are they frozen, or are they slowly walking backwards back up the steps into the house instead of turning around.  Then antennae?  Mind=Blown. Wow. Whatever Staton and Curtis are smoking, I'll have one too.



Kit and Carlyle by Larry Wright

I add this one only because the cat looks like my cat, and my son turned on the shower Sunday night and got him when he did not see the little guy napping in there. 

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02/17/1938?

Love Is...

How is this love? Here's hoping Naked Girl gets a new boyfriend from now on because Naked Boy was clearly an awful person.

9 Chickweed Lane

Chickweed baffles me 40% of the time, angers me 15% of the time and saddens me 35% of the time. This is the rare 10% that actually makes me chuckle.

Dick Tracy

Has Dick Tracy lost weight? And it's funny because another Dick Tracy villain is going to die.

The Buckets

Who else thinks he just kept that bottle of aspirin in there because he thought of this joke eight years ago when he first bought the aspirin and was just waiting for the right moment?

B.C.

I'm assuming the Fat Broad has the bleached bones of Clooney, Roberts and Pacino in her cave that she dug up after the nuclear fallout cleared that created this post-apocalyptic future.

Free Range

This one is for my wife.

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Fridays Just Got Slightly Better

It's Brian, now on Fridays and Saturdays for your enjoyment*. I actually happen to have a lot of strips for you today so let's get on it.

Big Nate

I get Nate's frustration with these Cheez Doodles. I consider myself a baked cheese cracker connoisseur (although I get the feeling these Doodles and Weezies are more like Cheetos) and I can tell you that Cheez-Its are more salty while Cheese Nips are more cheesy. To get a good mix you usually have to go to a generic brand but then you risk the chance that the crackers taste like the box they come in.

Adam@Home

Does anyone else get tired of the coffee jokes in this strip? I know I do.

Dick Tracy

I really like the art on Dick Tracy now especially since the last artist couldn't draw his way out of a paper bag because his paper bags looked like hands. When I heard Joe Staton was taking over I was excited because that's an artist I know. I know him best from his work on DC's Guy Gardner. There was a time where you couldn't see Guy Gardner without Staton's signature.

Birdbrains

That man actually looks like he's about to have an Alien burst out of his chest. But what do I know? I, too, am a spectator.

Arlo and Janis

Wait--What? Ew.

Frazz

For my new job I now have to wear shorts or I will die of heat exhaustion and I can tell you right now that I hate it. My once soft, milky-white legs are now cut, scrapped, dirty and bug bitten. I hate wearing shorts. Fun fact: Before now, I haven't worn shorts since 2005 when I was trying to impress a girl.**

Drabble

Drabble should lift with his legs...and get closer to the box...and pick up the box from the bottom...or do a "team lift"...




*Enjoyment not guaranteed.
**Sidenote: Mission accomplished.

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Heathcliff: No One Should

It's Meekrat, doing Mondays now, and you should read my site. There's a new comic up there. So yeah, here's some comic reviews:

Close to Home, 07/18

It's not a bad joke, but the caption for it is really clumsy. All we really need to know is that he's a doctor, while the bypass stuff is simply extraneous information. Perhaps a better way to tell it would simply to have the doctor walking into his office carrying the box of old, used medical supplies?

Dick Tracy, 07/18

Honeymoon's mother was a woman from space who married Dick Tracy's son and was later killed in a car bombing. Did you know that there was a whole thing around the sixties when stuff like that was normal? People from space and sci-fi related stuff, I mean. Not car bombing.

For Heaven's Sake, 07/18

This joke is lame and, while this is the first time I've seen this comic, I'm willing to bet it's even worse than "B. C." at its most religious. Let's keep a look out, shall we?

Heathcliff, 07/18

Heathcliff may have come first, but it was never more popular than Garfield. Even when both of them had cartoons, Garfield always had an edge over the one he usurped. The show is remembered now, but when I found out it was a comic strip, I was quite surprised. No one cares about Heathcliff, really, which is why I was quite surprised when I found this game at GameStop (I had photos of the game in the wild but they wouldn't transfer from my phone due to so many computer problems):

The fact that anyone would make any sort of video game about Heathcliff in 2011, or whenever this game came out, is absolutely absurd. At least they didn't put much effort into it, making it a simple "Spot the Differences" game using panels from the comic strip. Which doesn't explain this:

They actually put effort into making a Heathcliff game. What is this world coming to?

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A Day Early, Still A Dollar Short.

Dick Tracy, July 3, 2011

Dick Tracy, July 4, 2011

Dick Tracy's new creative team continues their excellent run by resurrecting a villain from the good ol' days, in a pretty modern plot of DVD bootlegging. This is also the 4th or 5th plot since they took over? The fact that I can't keep track means that the pace has picked up just a wee bit.

 

Zits, July 4, 2011

Stay classy, Zits. Of course, the strip is named "Zits," so bodily functions shouldn't really come as much of a surprise. And I probably shouldn't mention that a running gag at my house is "It's your cooking!"

 

The Argyle Sweater, July 4, 2011

Take my word for it honey, it's not you, it's AT&T.

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Introducing...Dustin

The National Cartoonists Society handed out the Reubens recently. Richard Thompson (Cul de Sac) won for Outstanding Cartoonist, beating out Stephen Pastis and Glen Keane. The comic strip Dustin won for Outstanding Newspaper Comic Strip and The Flying McCoys won Outstanding Newspaper Panel Cartoon. A full list of winners can be seen here.

We've showcased many strips here that were nominated for the Reuben but we've never featured Dustin so here we go.

Dustin 05/22 thru 05/29

Well, that wasn't bad at all. I don't necessarily consider a rolled-up newspaper a blunt object but whatever. Special thanks to King Features Syndicate and their DailyInk website for actually having the last month of Dustin posted. Now let's look at some Sunday comics.

Heart of the City

Sadly, Mark Tatulli wasn't nominated for anything but it's good to see he can still have a good time. And speaking of Mark Tatulli...

Lio

Panels from Dick Tracy

What? When was the last terrorist attack in America? May 10, 2010 when a man tried to use a pipe bomb to blow up a mosque. He failed. Before that? The Christmas Day or Underwear Bomber in 2009. Also unsuccessful. Jim Doherty, quit trying to scare us.

Betty

Everything he's doing is kind of dangerous and since it is just a blinking turn signal, I don't think it's worth getting into a car wreck.

The Knight Life

Oh, no. It appears that Drinky Crow has finally drank himself to death.

Momma

Ha! Well, it's about time Momma learned that the people who work in banks are soulless. Even the tellers. They are the worst.

The Born Loser

Brutus, you go into a fancy restaurant by yourself so the waiter is probably thinking you are waiting for the rest of your party because who in the hell goes to a fancy, sit-down restaurant by yourself?

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Why Was the Breast Milk in the Freezer?

I don't think I have any Sunday to post today but I did get a good stash of Saturday comics so let's get on with it. Don't forget to check out my site which comes back from a Garfield-related hiatus.

All strips are from 5/14/11:

Pickles

If anybody is going to be a zombie, it would be Earl. A perfect end to a good storyline.

Dick Tracy

"Oh, I don't think we need a drug-sniffing dog. Do you have a straw or a rolled-up dollar bill?"

Big Nate

Why doesn't he just say "Thank you very much" and leave it at that?

Why do I do "what-if" scenarios with fictional characters.

Frazz

I know playing "cowboy vs. Indians" is politically incorrect and it should technically be "U.S. Cavalry vs. Indians" or something like that but I'm starting to get to sneaking suspicion that Jef Mallett had a terrible childhood and that he sniffs his own farts.

Speed Bump

Speaking of farts, that's what that web address looks like "fartin' cookie dot com". You know, a quick search shows that fortunecookie.com is taken but fortune_cookie.com isn't. Why didn't Speed Bump guy use fortune_cookie.com instead of frtn_cookie.com?

The Knight Life

Ew.

Brewster Rockit! Space Guy

Brewster Rockit. If he's ever been not funny then I don't want to hear about it.

Zack Hill

I completely agree with the boy's sentiment here. But MySpace's biggest draw is that it has Friendster? No wonder MySpace sucks.

Argyle Sweater

Uh, oh Billy. I'd quit taunting the zombies if I were you.

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