On Tipping

Bliss

The colorist really should not have made the characters' torsos flesh colored.  Now everyone looks like nerdy Chippendale dancers.

Broom Hilda

Wha?  This monster has a very roundabout method of collecting victims.  I don't imagine that many "vacuum cleaner salespersons" would just happen to walk by this darkened cave, let alone possess the inclination to accept the sign's invitation.  Yet apparently this exact scenario has happened at least 4 times.

The Buckets

Weird, inexplicable storyline in The Buckets this week.  This kid just sits outside next to a tip jar while absentmindedly playing a video game.  Strangers walk by and ask him if he is some sort of undesirable/annoying character; the kid says "no" and then the stranger leaves a dollar in the jar and moves on.  Perhaps the cartoonist is suggesting we all should show greater appreciation for innocent and unobnoxious.  So readers, next time you see someone on the street minding their own business and not being a prick be sure to tip them generously.

Cul de Sac

"Because you're my only hope for grandchildren.  Petey's off-putting OCD tendencies will never get him laid."

Off the Mark

Ah... sweet vengeance.

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Bubble Gum Farts and People Food

Adam@Home

Laura is too amused by her own cleverness to pay attention to her parenting responsibilities.  But it works out in the end anyway:  Laura's absent-minded detachment from her kids is punishment enough for Clayton.

Boom Hilda

So it looks like Broom Hilda has finally been caught and is being tried for witchcraft.  Judging by the trigger happy (or should I say match-strike happy?) attitude of the jury, I'd say Broom Hilda isn't long for this world.

The Buckets

The mom here isn't overreacting to her son's "Kids Say the Darndest Things" moment, rather, she is slow-jamming her favorite song that just popped into her head.  Yeah, overmedicating yourself can have disturbing consequences.

Close to Home

Somebody out there please make this a real thing.  It would be HILARIOUS.

Eek!

Ug.  This gag has been done before.  Come on Eek!

Speaking of retread ideas...

F Minus

The Flying McCoys 

A near identical gag on the same day!  I swear, cartoonists all must subscribe to same newsletter.  The back page must be "10 Comic Strip Ideas In Case You Are Lame and Uncreative and Totally Can't Think of Anything Right Now."

Alright, that's all for now.  See you next week!

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Happy Pi Day!

Happy pi day everybody! Now on to comics review!

The Born Looser

Run away, Jacob Yaeger! This man may have been born a looser, but I'm pretty sure his aura of excessive personal failure can rub off on those around him.

Boom Hilda

No Prozac for you, Broom Hilda. You'll just have to soldier through your crippling depression.

The Buckets

Over 8 hours of continuous sleep? Sheesh, this guy should be a little more grateful that his body clock is fully cooperating.

Cornered

I don't think longer legs make you any better at jumping. Maybe the opposite actually. If this guy was playing basketball, he would have less of a need to jump as he would already be closer to the basket. The gag would probably work better if the employer was interviewing a frog or kangaroo—you know, something that can actually jump.

Momma

Momma's worst fears and nightmares are confusing. So which is the main worry here? That her son is a beggar, or that he is disillusioned? Also, I don't see how demanding $2 as opposed to $1 would make anyone think themselves a businessman.

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02/17/1938?

Love Is...

How is this love? Here's hoping Naked Girl gets a new boyfriend from now on because Naked Boy was clearly an awful person.

9 Chickweed Lane

Chickweed baffles me 40% of the time, angers me 15% of the time and saddens me 35% of the time. This is the rare 10% that actually makes me chuckle.

Dick Tracy

Has Dick Tracy lost weight? And it's funny because another Dick Tracy villain is going to die.

The Buckets

Who else thinks he just kept that bottle of aspirin in there because he thought of this joke eight years ago when he first bought the aspirin and was just waiting for the right moment?

B.C.

I'm assuming the Fat Broad has the bleached bones of Clooney, Roberts and Pacino in her cave that she dug up after the nuclear fallout cleared that created this post-apocalyptic future.

Free Range

This one is for my wife.

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Nose puppets are weird.

Hey all. Time for some Wednesday comics review.

The Buckets

I don't want to destroy the mother's scholarship dreams, but the creative writing establishment generally looks down at that kind of pulpy sci-fi.

Agnes

I almost googled "Eastern Boogervian nose puppets" to see if it was a real thing, but then I

realized, "Oh yeah, 'booger-vian.'" Sigh. Sometimes it takes me a few seconds to get stuff.

In the Bleachers

It's a bit weird that Fitzpatrick is the name of a simpleton in this comic, especially considering now that Ryan Fitzpatrick, a Harvard graduate, is doing well for the Buffalo Bills.

Lola

I don't know about you, but I find cussing old ladies to be hilarious.

Birdbrains

This joke may have worked if not for the stupid faux-native name. "Farts-On-Crackers?" Really?

Chuckle Bros

Where the hell is everyone else at this convention? There's an open bottle of wine and two filled glasses at every table but no people! That's just creepy.

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DNROTFLBCMMWVMOML*

It's Wednesday again, which means it's time for some more comics review. (Scroll to the bottom of the post to read what the title is supposed to mean.) Also, if you're unemployed or hate your job be sure to check out my webcomic.

Candorville

It's unusual seeing Lemont alone in his house in his Star Trek pajamas late at night. Normally, the characters in this strip are found talking to each other in person outside on rooftops, park benches, or while strolling down the street. (Which is quite commendable; lots of strips tend to center all the action around one indoor location. I'm looking at you Get Fuzzy!) So it's understandable that the author has no idea how to depict an online conversation. Proper spelling? Only nerds have time for that. Correct punctuation and capitalization? This isn't a freakin' essay! Ellipses? Okay, now that's just crazy.

On the other hand, reading a bunch of truncated text speak in a daily comic strip is quite annoying, as evidenced by the final panel with its lame punchline. ROTFLMAOBIJKSDTIS? Ug, am I supposed to spend 10 minutes trying to figure out what all those letters stand for? Okay, fine then. 10 minute pause. Alright, I'm fairly certain it's, "Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Ass Off But I'm Just Kidding So Don't Take It Seriously." Bleh, I don't feel any better for having done that.

Grand Avenue

I'm pretty sure that kid is too young to be familiar with the expression, "eating crow." Also, why the hell is he wearing the same shirt as his teacher? This can only mean one thing: Michael is the teacher's younger self, a hallucination created by his brain to deal with some repressed trauma that occurred in that very school some 35 years ago.

Adam@Home

Not so, Clayton, it's your 30s when you're too old to have any fun. Sigh.

The Buckets

Basically, the dad is saying his son is going to be in school forever. That sucks. At least Clayton got a loose deadline.

The Duplex

Whoa. Rare appearance from the female side of the duplex. I remember getting excited about growing taller, not so much about gaining weight. Most kids don't give a shit about how much they weigh.

Herb and Jamaal

Driver's License Bureau: Photo Division? Huh? Is the writer aware of the real place people go to get their driver's license pictures taken? It's called the Department of Motor Vehicles.

*Definitely Not Rolling On The Floor Laughing Because Candorville Made Me Waste Valuable Minutes Of My Life.

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Daddy's Tripping Out

Hello. Peter here again, bringing you comics review for Wednesday.

The Buckets

You know what's weird? Having your own child mindfuck you out of having any kind of pleasant morning. Kudos to the kid though. If he's smart about it, he'll torture his hapless father into giving him a larger allowance.

Cow and Boy

That's a pretty sweet bigfoot foot. Now on to make footprints in the woods and inspire another generation of looney bigfoot hunters!

Cornered

Ha! Joke's on him—they bought our debt too. (On a side note, that's a fairly creative looking alien. Most comics page invaders are your typical bug-eyed humanoids. This thing looks like a cross between a stork and lump of play-doh.)

Broom Hilda

Another example of children having the mental upper hand on their parents. One more strip like this and we officially have our theme for the day.

Daddy's Home

Okay, this is close but not quite in the same vein as The Buckets and Broom Hilda. Here we have parents just tripping themselves out over their oblivious (and probably stoned) son.

Eek!

This is rather bloody for a newspaper comic, no? I think the joke could have worked with just the arm sticking out from under the wheel. Does the dead caveman need to look like a squashed bug on a windshield?

Jump Start

Is "texting while walking" really illegal in Philadelphia? Or is this just a lame setup for a stupid punchline?

Luann

Whoa! Gunther is about to be seduced by freakishly large-haired girl! Good for him.

Heart of the City

Alas, so much for our theme. I suppose adults pacifying cagey, stressed-0ut children with sweet treats is much closer to reality anyway.

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Silly ignorant children!

On TV, kids are funny because they act older than they are and are always sarcastic and wisecracking.  In comic strips, kids are funny because they're stupid.  Observe:

Soup to Nutz:

I think he can be forgiven for this.  It does happen to be the only state with the word "island" in the name.  Also, it isn't an island and yet its name suggests that it is.  In fact, if I was running that geography bee, I'd give him extra points for pointing out that glaring inconsistency.  Good job, kid.

The Buckets:

Look, if your kid asks you a silly question, they ought to expect a silly answer.  He could just say, "Because we're not birds," but that answer, while slightly informative, is incredibly boring and uninteresting.  Also, it's not guaranteed that the kid will accept that as a valid answer.  Not only did he give an answer that was acceptable, but it was also entirely true (I mean, the rain would ruin the toilet paper, among other things).  Good job, Dad.

Wizard of Id:

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but I was always under the impression that St. Patrick's Day was primarily an Irish holiday, and that kilts and bagpipes were primarily Scottish.  If I am wrong, this strip might be mildly amusing.

Either way, I would also like to know why the wizard is about to put a bottle of "X" into that washtub.  Beware, whoever is going to take a bath in that!

The Barn:

I imagine the final panel is meant to be referencing a certain popular song.  The song it is referring to is, however, not coming to my mind at the moment, no matter how many times I read the strip.  It might be  a brilliant pun otherwise.  Very well set up, I thought.

Who's ignorant now?  Me.  Yeah.  Shoot.

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Cat psychiatry

Today, two panels dealing with...  well, you'll see.  Also a couple more that don't deal with that.


Heathcliff:

...and how incredibly awesome it is, and how you need to grow it out more.  Unfortunately, to properly pull off the look, you will need to get a top hat, a monocle, or both.  A cowboy hat may also work, but then you'll need to get a fake sheriff badge as well.

Moderately Confused:

"Well, I've been continuously beaned by bricks since I was a small child, and I think it's messed with my head a bit.  I actually started to like it.  Yes.  I hate to say it, but...  I think I've developed a brick fetish.  So, yeah.  I think...  yeah, that's probably why they call me Krazy.

It could also be because that's my first name."

"Great, good.  Now, let's move on to your gender confusion..."

The Buckets:

Time to learn some tricks that don't involve the audience.  Or better yet, if you have an uncooperative audience, make sure that you have your magic death box with you, either the one that you can saw people in half with or the one you can stick a bunch of swords into.

Chuckle Bros.:

I could've guessed that in one note.  I mean, the first twang of the banjo just gives it away immediately.

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